There is so much I have to learn, but I'm realizing that that is ok. Patience is a virtue, especially with one's self, and I have never been especially full of that virtue. But I'm learning and striving to change, and I know that if I just keep at it, eventually I will succeed. Interpersonal relations aren't always a strong point for me, but the only way to change that is to put myself in situations where I have to improve.
So I had an idea today that was a little intimidating, almost a little frightening. And because of this thought, I realized what my pattern is in dealing with things that frighten me. Usually, when I feel scared or intimidated, I force myself to do whatever I'm scared of. Sometimes it takes me a couple of tries before I can muster enough nerve to actually follow through, but I really am determined to improve myself and to overcome these issues. I guess with my current idea the issue is not whether or not I have the guts to go through with it, but rather that I'm not sure if it would be a good thing to do. But that thought is a little muffled because I almost want to do it now to prove to myself that I can. Well, I guess we'll have to just wait and see how it all goes.
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